EXAM · 来自 英语四级写作 · 2016 年 12 月 · 第 3 套 · Part I

2016年12月·第3套英语四级写作 · 题目、范文与解析

本页是 2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作 的写作真题页(四六级短文写作)—— 与试卷排版同一卷面:完整写作要求(Directions,词数要求 120–180 词)连续排印 ,卷面下方直接给出参考范文(159 词)与整篇中译、逐段拆解,另附审题立意、谋篇句架与评分自检 。

PROMPT & MODEL ESSAY · 写作题和范文

写作题和范文

本页写作题面、参考范文与逐段解析由懒笔记基于2016年12月·第3套 英语四级写作原卷整理。与试卷排版同一卷面:完整写作要求(Directions,含主题、文体、词数与署名约束)连续排印。写作是生产性任务、无 ABCD 标准答案——题面即整道题;卷面下方直接给出满足全部硬约束的参考范文、整篇中译与逐段拆解。

真题卷第3套(2016-12) • 四级
Part I
Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write an essay. Suppose you have two options upon graduation: one is to work in a state-owned business and the other in a joint venture. You are to make a choice between the two. Write an essay to explain the reasons for your choice.You should write at least 120 words but no more than 180 words.

【参考范文 · 159 词】写作无唯一标准答案,以下为达标示范

When faced with the choice between a state-owned business and a joint venture upon graduation, I would firmly choose the latter. For me, a joint venture is where my abilities can be truly tested and rewarded.

The first reason lies in career development. Unlike a state-owned business, where promotion often depends on seniority, a joint venture usually rewards employees on the basis of performance, which means a hard-working newcomer like me can rise quickly. Besides, working with foreign partners exposes me to advanced management skills and a global vision, both of which are invaluable to a fresh graduate. What matters most to me, moreover, is the dynamic culture: instead of a fixed routine, a joint venture encourages initiative and innovation, allowing me to realize my personal value.

Admittedly, a state-owned business offers greater stability, yet stability is not what I pursue at this stage. Therefore, I am convinced that a joint venture is the wiser choice for my future.

【参考译文】

毕业时面对国有企业和合资企业之间的选择,我会坚定地选择后者。对我而言,合资企业正是能真正检验并回报我能力的地方。

第一个理由在于职业发展。不同于国有企业往往论资排辈式的晋升,合资企业通常按业绩回报员工,这意味着像我这样肯拼的新人能够快速上升。此外,与外方伙伴共事让我接触到先进的管理技能和全球化视野,这两点对一名应届毕业生都是无价的。而对我最重要的,是那种充满活力的企业文化:合资企业不搞一成不变的固定流程,而是鼓励主动与创新,让我得以实现个人价值。

诚然,国有企业提供了更强的稳定性,然而稳定并不是我现阶段所追求的。因此,我确信合资企业是我未来更明智的选择。

【第 1 段】首段落实开门见山。首段用 "When faced with the choice ... I would firmly choose the latter" 直接表态,再用 "For me, a joint venture is where my abilities can be truly tested and rewarded" 总说理由,落实了 outline 第一段「亮明选择」的功能。

【第 2 段】主体段三理由分层。"The first reason lies in career development" 起手,"Unlike a state-owned business, where promotion often depends on seniority" 用对比坐实优势,再以 "Besides" 和 "What matters most to me" 递进补出视野与文化两条,落实了「分理由论证」。

【第 3 段】结尾让步再重申。"Admittedly, a state-owned business offers greater stability, yet stability is not what I pursue" 先让步后转折,"Therefore, I am convinced that a joint venture is the wiser choice" 重申立场并呼应首段,落实了「让步重申收尾」。

ANALYSIS · 审题与立意

这道题到底要写什么、立意是什么

动笔前先钉死本题的核心写作任务与读者语域 ,再定中心立意与要展开的要点 —— 这些是本题特有的内容判断,不是通用套路。

核心任务

国企合资二选一并说理

本题要写的不是泛泛比较,而是 You are to make a choice between the two——在 work in a state-owned business and the other in a joint venture 之间明确挑一个,再 explain the reasons for your choice。一句话钉死:亮出「我选哪个」,然后讲清「我为什么选它」。

读者 · 语域

无指定读者用正式书面语

题目没有给出收信人,这是一篇纯议论短文,读者默认是阅卷老师。因此用第一人称 I 表达个人立场即可,通篇保持正式书面语,不用缩写口语,也不必写称呼和落款。

中心立意

坚定选择合资企业

本篇立场:毕业后我选择去合资企业工作。围绕 make a choice between the two 只押一边、不骑墙,让全文所有理由都服务于「合资企业更适合此刻的我」这一个中心。

要展开的要点
  1. 职业发展凭实力更快 合资企业按业绩提拔,应届生凭努力就能快速上升;这正是国企论资排辈的相对短板,一条理由同时说清了自己的优势和对方的劣势。
  2. 接触国际视野与先进管理 与外方合作能学到先进的管理经验和全球化视野,对一个刚毕业、经验为零的人来说是稀缺财富。
  3. 开放文化利于实现自我价值 合资企业鼓励主动与创新,能让个人价值得到发挥,而不是被固定不变的流程框住。
STRUCTURE · 谋篇与逐段

怎么分段、每段写什么、能套哪些句架

按写作家族给出现成的段落框架(每段承担什么功能),并为每段配可直接套用的 功能句架(留出填本题内容的空位)。段序与上方参考范文一一对应。

  1. 第 1 段
    亮明选择 开门见山表态:在国企与合资之间选合资,并点出总的理由方向,为下文埋线。
  2. 第 2 段
    分理由论证 集中给出 2-3 条支持理由,每条配一句解释或与国企的对比展开。
  3. 第 3 段
    让步重申收尾 承认对方一点长处后转折,重申选择合资、收束全文并呼应首段。
第 1 段 选合资并点明总理由

本段落点:明确选择合资企业,并总说「这里更能检验和回报我的能力」,为后文职业发展、国际视野、开放文化三条理由定调。

  • 开门见山亮观点 When faced with the choice between ... and ..., I would firmly choose ...(在……和……之间,我会坚定选择……)
  • 一句话总说理由 For me, ... is where ...(对我而言,……正是……的地方)
第 2 段 发展视野文化三理由

本段落点:理由一,合资凭业绩提拔、应届生上升快(对比国企论资排辈);理由二,与外方合作能学到先进管理和全球视野;理由三,开放文化鼓励主动创新、能实现个人价值。三条都在回应 explain the reasons for your choice。

  • 引出首条理由 The first reason lies in ...(第一个理由在于……)
  • 用对比坐实优势 Unlike ..., ... usually ..., which means ...(不同于……,……通常……,这意味着……)
  • 递进补充理由 Besides, ... What matters most to me is ...(此外,……。而对我最重要的是……)
第 3 段 认稳定但仍选合资

本段落点:承认国企更稳定,但当下的我不追求稳定,因此重申合资是更明智的选择,呼应首段、收束全文。

  • 让步认对方长处 Admittedly, ... offers ..., yet ...(诚然,……有……,然而……)
  • 重申立场收尾 Therefore, I am convinced that ... is the wiser choice for ...(因此,我确信……是……更明智的选择)
REVIEW · 自检避坑

本题在四个评分维度怎样算达标、容易在哪丢分

按阅卷四维(内容切题 / 结构连贯 / 语言准确 / 字数格式)给出本题达标要点,并把最容易踩的低分写法摆出来 + 给改法 —— 这是写作版的「狠拆诱人错项」。

  • 内容切题
    选定和说理都要落地 本题达标要点:全文只押合资一边、绝不骑墙;每条理由都有解释或对比,不空喊「it is good」。最易失分是通篇比较国企合资却始终不表态。
  • 结构连贯
    三段清晰理由分层 本题达标:首段观点句靠前,主体段用序数词与过渡词分层三条理由,结尾用让步转折收束。最忌通篇一大段、想到哪写到哪。
  • 语言准确
    表态动词搭配要对 本题多用 choose to do、work in a joint venture、depend on seniority 等搭配,动笔前先确认介词。适度用 which、where 从句提升档次,但要保证从句结构完整。
  • 字数格式
    落在上下限之间的短文 本题要求 at least 120 words but no more than 180 words,是有硬性上下限的短文,不写称呼署名。理由太单薄容易不足下限,套话堆砌容易超出上限。
典型低分写法 · 反面示例与改法
  • 罗列两者不表态 反面示例:State-owned businesses are stable, while joint ventures are dynamic. Both have advantages. 只比较不选。改成:Both have advantages, but I would firmly choose a joint venture, because it rewards ability rather than seniority.
  • 理由空泛无论证 反面示例:I choose a joint venture because it is good and I like it. 空喊口号。改成:I choose a joint venture because it promotes employees on the basis of performance, so a hard-working graduate can rise quickly.
  • 逐字直译搭配错 反面示例:Joint venture can let me learn many advanced experiences. 是中式直译、搭配错误。改成:A joint venture allows me to gain advanced management experience.
FAQ · 关于本篇的常见问题

常见问题

围绕本题的写作题目与要求、作文类型、立意要点、参考范文、谋篇分段与评分丢分,逐条给出可核对的答案。

2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作的写作题目是什么?要求写多少字?
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作(Part I)的写作要求为:For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write an essay. Suppose you have two options upon graduation: one is to work in a state-owned business and the other in a joint venture. You are to make a choice between the two. Write an essay to explain the reasons for your choice.You should write at least 120 words but no more than 180 words. 本题要求120–180 词。
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作属于哪种类型的作文、有什么格式要求?
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作 是四六级短文写作(议论 / 应用文 / 报告等短文)。写作要求120–180 词。
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作(国企合资二选一并说理)应该怎么立意、写哪几个要点?
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作的中心立意是本篇立场:毕业后我选择去合资企业工作。围绕 make a choice between the two 只押一边、不骑墙,让全文所有理由都服务于「合资企业更适合此刻的我」这一个中心。可展开的要点:合资企业按业绩提拔,应届生凭努力就能快速上升;这正是国企论资排辈的相对短板,一条理由同时说清了自己的优势和对方的劣势;与外方合作能学到先进的管理经验和全球化视野,对一个刚毕业、经验为零的人来说是稀缺财富;合资企业鼓励主动与创新,能让个人价值得到发挥,而不是被固定不变的流程框住。
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作(国企合资二选一并说理)的参考范文是怎样的?多少词?
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作的参考范文(159 词):When faced with the choice between a state-owned business and a joint venture upon graduation, I would firmly choose the latter. For me, a joint venture is where my abilities can be truly tested and rewarded. The first reason lies in career development. Unlike a state-owned business, where promotion often depends on seniority, a joint venture usually rewards employees on the basis of performance, which means a hard-working newcomer like me can rise quickly. Besides, working with foreign partners exposes me to advanced management skills and a global vision, both of which are invaluable to a fresh graduate. What matters most to me, moreover, is the dynamic culture: instead of a fixed routine, a joint venture encourages initiative and innovation, allowing me to realize my personal value. Admittedly, a state-owned business offers greater stability, yet stability is not what I pursue at this stage. Therefore, I am convinced that a joint venture is the wiser choice for my future.
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作(国企合资二选一并说理)这篇作文怎么分段、每段写什么?
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作的参考范文共 3 段:第 1 段(亮明选择)开门见山表态:在国企与合资之间选合资,并点出总的理由方向,为下文埋线;第 2 段(分理由论证)集中给出 2-3 条支持理由,每条配一句解释或与国企的对比展开;第 3 段(让步重申收尾)承认对方一点长处后转折,重申选择合资、收束全文并呼应首段。
2016年12月英语四级真题第3套 写作(国企合资二选一并说理)作文容易在哪丢分?
按内容切题 / 结构连贯 / 语言准确 / 字数格式四维评分,本题达标要点:内容切题——本题达标要点:全文只押合资一边、绝不骑墙;每条理由都有解释或对比,不空喊「it is good」。最易失分是通篇比较国企合资却始终不表态;结构连贯——本题达标:首段观点句靠前,主体段用序数词与过渡词分层三条理由,结尾用让步转折收束。最忌通篇一大段、想到哪写到哪;语言准确——本题多用 choose to do、work in a joint venture、depend on seniority 等搭配,动笔前先确认介词。适度用 which、where 从句提升档次,但要保证从句结构完整;字数格式——本题要求 at least 120 words but no more than 180 words,是有硬性上下限的短文,不写称呼署名。理由太单薄容易不足下限,套话堆砌容易超出上限。 典型低分写法(须避免):反面示例:State-owned businesses are stable, while joint ventures are dynamic. Both have advantages. 只比较不选。改成:Both have advantages, but I would firmly choose a joint venture, because it rewards ability rather than seniority;反面示例:I choose a joint venture because it is good and I like it. 空喊口号。改成:I choose a joint venture because it promotes employees on the basis of performance, so a hard-working graduate can rise quickly;反面示例:Joint venture can let me learn many advanced experiences. 是中式直译、搭配错误。改成:A joint venture allows me to gain advanced management experience。

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